Becoming a Full-time Marketer. If not now, then when?

Last Friday, I parted my way from science, aka the thing I have been doing since the age of 19.

I came from a household of scientists. While other kids' childhood might be about toys and mud fights, mine was more like watching Discovery or National Geography on Saturday mornings, reading pop science books, and doing super junior-level experiments with my father at his lab.

Perhaps it was crucial to winning recognition that I disregarded my own desires. I was a robot, going through trials to prove myself worthy. In the end, it seemed almost meaningless to jump through fire to accomplish so much for others.

The insecurity in me was so profound that I could barely remember my last time doing something or anything for myself. My work hours are longer than most people I know of. People love asking me how I juggle between my day job and the other projects I do. The PC answer has been, " I'm a workaholic." Truth be told, I was afloat in this vast pool of water without any sense of direction. All I knew or know is to paddle like there was no tomorrow.

I resonate a lot with Eric Heisserer, the scriptwriter of Arrival and Birdbox. I remember translating his interview from English to Traditional Chinese at the Starbuck around the corner from where I lived in Dallas. Heisserer said, " I was a cubicle monkey. So I wrote relentlessly after work. I know I have to keep writing, and I will write myself out of it."

I kept his words in mind for many years to come.

Now I am leaving the lab. I left like how he inspired me to. I am not becoming an outstanding Hollywood scriptwriter like him. But I am heading toward something— unfamiliar, scary, and nightmare-triggering. I started a new position at HungryPanda, as their Marketing Associate, on top of the regular pop-ups, Sphyrn would continue to have.

But it has to be right. It has to justify the loss and relief that I've been experiencing. Call me crazy. If craziness gives me more freedom, then I don't mind being crazy at all.

Cheers.

p.s. Note for the 18-year-old self — you are not going to become a scientist. Dr. lin is not happening. Your life is gonna be shit for a while, and there is nothing glamourous about it. But don't worry. Your glass will never be empty, and boredom is never a word associated with your madness. Welcome to the party.